Shannondasuperstar’s Weblog

{January 16, 2009}   just a day of thoughts

So I don’t know why I am feeling like writting but I am and I think it is going to make me feel  better before I go on with this day.. So as you may know things are hard for me right now and yeah I know we all go through this but today is so crazy because I feel it more than I ever had. I have so many thoughts running through my brain and it is making my head hurt oh so bad, but like I tell everyone this is what I am use to. My heart hearts so bad and it feels like it is going to burst out of my chest at any point with the blood viens and all. I feel like a book that is never going to end a chapter with know closer. I feel like giving up all it all and just leaving and never returning going to stay in a shelter some where any where would be better then here right now. I fucking hate this I am sick of being so happy about anything right now and that is not who I am.. I am mad ass fuck!!! And today is the day that I am coming to notice that. I feel empty like I don’t care about anything. I feel like I am getting back to the place where I was before before I meet all the great people that I know now. But sometimes I guess you have to do what you have to. Making away for yourself and not caring how you get to it. I want to jump on a bus and just ride off with it some where just see what life has in store for me. I mean I am not leaving my girlfriend or anything she has to come. But I don’t know what is wrong with me today and I just had to right some of my thoughts I don’t really know what else to say.


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